A Master Transformational and Executive Coach, Psychotherapist, Individual and Collective Trauma Therapist and Consciousness Teacher, Ester pioneered the integration of mystical principles with Constellations for deep personal and collective transformation. Also a core faculty member of Thomas Hübl’s team and Mobius Leadership’s offerings, for the past 18 years, Ester has delivered personal mastery, consciousness and transformational healing work in the business world.
This post is a short edited excerpt of Ester’s journey which transformed her near-death trauma into the foundation for her mystical healing practice. Listen to her full interview on The Gifts of Trauma Podcast.
Spirituality is the backbone for any healing process. My work integrates mystical principles with trauma healing, and its foundation is the divine.
Since I was very young, I have been very interested in what we call the divine; what is felt but not seen: I have also always been interested in how other people didn’t see what I saw, or feel what I felt. These interests have guided me throughout my life.
As a newborn, I died twice and was brought back each time. While it gave me a big trauma, it also gave me access to something deeper, that is real, that is guiding and embracing me all the time. So for me, the deepest trauma brought the deepest healing and connected me to being in service to every other human.
When I was born, thanks to my trauma, I could not bond safely with my mother. But I was not alone as I felt, and still feel, so embraced by this other energy, this divine embracing. It is so real. I was in the world and not in the world. I grew up in 2 dimensions.
Today, sometimes when I’m working with clients, I see them shifting, transforming and healing right in front of me. Getting here took years of progressive inner exploration, and being very truthful to myself about my shadows.
Years ago, I committed to Thomas Hübl’s training, which has some spiritual elements. Of course, the community, the teacher and my strength were all very important, but there was a moment when I encountered what I needed to heal my inability to feel safe in connection. It was a process in which I felt like I was dying again, but I stayed with it. And after being in this process for a very long time, Thomas exclaimed, “Wow, your energy completely changed.” I felt something in me opening and the energy flowing. It was extraordinary. Ever since that day, I have existed in a different reality.
When working in collective healing and really staying present to the process, the whole field, as many as 500 people, becomes a unified body in which everybody is attuning to what needs to get refined in them. They are also attuning to whatever needs to be integrated from their collective trauma. They’re able to look at the trauma and make changes. It’s a physical synchronization in which everyone is emotionally and mentally connected. And the facilitator of this process, which in the training we call the innovation inspiration, I call the divine.
This process is similar to a symphony conductor attuning the individual excellence of their musicians into one body that creates a flow experience able to shift the physical, emotional and mental states of those audience members who are fully present.
After devoting 30 years to my transformative healing practice, my Zen and Kabbalah practices, I consider myself an artist in the healing modality. Through these spiritual practices, my work gets more and more refined. I don’t believe that anyone can access a new level of consciousness through one workshop, because it takes years to get really grounded in whatever practice you develop, whatever calling you pursue. So when that flow experience happens, behind it is years of really dedicating yourself to your practices and devotions.
I never intended to do this work. I wanted to be a diplomat. But I came to it through healing my own issues with intimacy and relating. My early life experiences meant being here (as a human) has not been easy for me. But I have healed my inability to connect with and relate to other humans. It took time. I was like a concert level musician who practices with great discipline for decades. Today, after almost 30 years of practice, or devotion, I am both very approachable and far more relational.
Early in my healing journey, I received the great gift of meeting Bert Hellinger [the developer of Family Constellations, a therapeutic method within systemic work that uses representatives to gain insight into hidden family and organizational dynamics, often revealing how ancestral traumas or unresolved issues unconsciously influence present-day patterns]. I believe that Bert, in his grace, was a genius. Somehow he brought mystical principles you can’t see in the Bible into the secular world, which did not become allergic to them.
Constellations work enables us to access that mystical level of information, so it is a beautiful bridge for sensitivity and intuitive capacity. I trained in Family Constellations for my own healing. For me, it was so sacred, it took me 10 years of training before I dared to lead one.
When I am facilitating a constellation, whether it’s representative of a family or organizational system, I position them and then they start to move because they’re a body. I can see at the beginning, where there’s an entanglement, where there’s trauma, as it’s frozen and fixated. When I initiate what Bert Hellinger described as, “Including what was excluded,” the whole system starts to move. This coming into resonance seems like magic. The clients really resonate with what they are observing. They feel it in their bodies. And then their collective body begins to flow. I’m trained in craniosacral therapy, so I can feel the energy flowing. And when that really flows, that constellation heals itself.
When I came to Spain, they asked me to do constellations work, pro bono, for some NGOs. A leader who met me there asked… “Do you think it works in a company?” I said, “Of course, it works in any system.” So he recommended me, and then I met Thomas Hübl, and then I met Amy Fox, CEO of Mobius Leadership, who invited me into her training. So it just happened organically. I don’t have a web page and I don’t need one as my work is all through word of mouth. I never thought I would be a therapist. Now I see it as my hidden purpose. Today I’m connected to shifting and transforming, but before, I had no clue. Life showed me the way.
The Gifts of Trauma is a weekly podcast that features personal stories of trauma, transformation, healing, and the gifts revealed on the path to authenticity. Listen to the interview, and if you like it, please subscribe and share.
